Snapshot from RHS: Continental Congress Convenes in Room 306

Groups not present at the original signing of the Declaration of Independence speak their case to the Continental Congress in Michael King’s 11th grade U.S. History class. Students sit in rows labeled with tri-fold paper nameplates: Slaves, Poor White Men, Women, and Native-Americans. The Continental Congress presides in a line of four desks by the whiteboard.

Girl in North Face jacket, representing Poor White Men: In the Declaration of Natural Rights, it says all men are created equal, and there’s no distinction between rich and poor. So we think you guys are dumb because… who are you to say? You have to uphold our rights.

[Long pause]

Mr. King: Other comments from Poor White Men? Alright, Slaves. Present your case.

Boy wearing shoes with neon laces, representing Slaves: Everything here is bogus to us. It’s hypocritical of you to write this because we’re not getting justice. We want you guys to change this to make it fair for everybody. The consequences for not making these changes… will be marching. We will march and protest in the light of God!

Girl in black hoodie, also representing Slaves: Yeah! We won’t work for you.

Neon Laces: We have a protest song… [Starts singing…]

Whole class: No, no, no!

Boy with faux-hawk, representing Women: We don’t support this document because it says all men are created equal but women are not included… We don’t like that women are not mentioned, that women cannot vote or work outside the house unless men ask them.

Continental Congress [all four stand, boy in “Renton High School” shirt speaks]: We support the Declaration of Independence because we wrote it, and we covered the bases. If you think we didn’t, prove it. We don’t like that you want us to put your complaints in our document. You guys need to be quiet. We wrote this, and we know we got it right the first time.

Mr. King, to Congress: You guys run the open floor.

Congress: So we call on people. We have the power and you need to raise your hands in an orderly fashion.

Boy with faux-hawk: That’s not a debate! I thought this was supposed to be a debate.

Congress: Native-Americans?

Girl eating Ritz crackers, for the Native-Americans: You didn’t come here to help us. You came here for profit. Do you think you are some undefeatable superpower? There are other superpowers too. Spain, Portugal, France… and they might come around.

Congress: Not true. We didn’t call it the Declaration of Profit. How does it make sense for us to do this for profit if it’s called a declaration of independence?

Ritz Cracker: You’re saying the words, but you aren’t doing anything. You’re using the right words but you aren’t using the right actions.

Congress: We can’t just go to Britain and start a war.

Ritz Cracker: But you can! You’re rich!

Neon Laces: Yeah. Why write and sign what you can’t do?

Congress: We didn’t have to write this. Britain would have conquered us, and you guys would still be getting raped. Why would you try to start a war without solving it with words first? Don’t come with guns ablazin’. Plus, we as a country do not have the money for a war. The four of us individually are rich, but as a country, we do not have the money to –

Ritz Cracker, interrupting: But it’s written here that all men are created as one!

Congress: Raise your hand!

Ritz Cracker: I can’t. You all cut it off.

Mr. King, to congress: What did you call Native-Americans in your document?

Congress: We called them savages. If you scalp people and wear bones, you’re a savage.

Ritz Cracker: You called us savages even though you killed us and took our land? Hypocrites. And besides, we did not all do those things.

Congress: When we first came here we looked at you as aliens. We had never seen anyone like you.

Ritz: You were alien to us too.

Congress: If you wear bones, you’re a savage.

Ritz: If you wear ruffles, you’re a savage.

Congress: We need to hear more from the Women.

Boy with faux-hawk, for the Women: Why can’t women go to war?

Congress: Women can’t go to war because someone has to stay home and raise the children. If both parents go to war no one will be home to raise the children and –

Ritz: I don’t like the tone of this argument.

Congress: You need to raise your elbow.

[Conversation unravels. Congress reiterates the necessity of hand-raising and states Poor White Men should not get much voice because they are uneducated. Mr. King facilitates discussion on what went well during the hearing and what could be improved.]

Note: Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of students. Derek Smith, the author of this column, works as a Language Arts teacher at Renton High School and advises the ARROW newsmagazine there.